By the time, you bring your new baby home, the new mother will have spent many months in preparation for the blessed event. She’s probably read countless books on baby care, not to mention all the advice she will have received from her own mother and other friends and relatives who have already had babies. Most importantly, a new mother will already have spent a good deal of time in shopping for everything that will be required to take care of your new son or daughter. But in all the excitement of the pending arrival, poor ol’ Dad is likely to be overlooked.
By now you’ve noticed that there’s a whole new language being spoken in your home. A simple discussion about Merino clothing for the new baby has probably already got you scratching your head in confusion. What the heck is a ‘layette’, some type of tiny barco-lounger? And what does ‘onesie’ mean – is that the last little piggy that goes “wheewheewhee, all the way home”? And for goodness sake, what in tarnation is a ‘baby kimono’ – aren’t those supposed to be just for Japanese babies…? Keep reading, Dad. I’ll let you in on a few of these ‘secret’ terms so that you can speak like a native when it comes to picking out clothes for Baby.
Layette: this word is a little deceiving, because it actually refers to all of the clothing needs for a newborn baby, including blankets, diapers, etc. – much more than just cute little outfits. So if you hear the mother-to-be and her friends urgently discussing the need to shop for the baby’s ‘layette’ to have it ready in time, they’re actually referring to ALL of the things that need to be ready for the big day.
Onesie: this one is particularly confusing, because it hints that there will be just one of whatever this item happens to be. Au contraire, Dad! New babies will need many onesies, because they can go through several of them in the course of a day (sometimes in the course of an hour!). The onesie is a staple of any layette, and it’s simply a clothing item that looks like a very long T-shirt that closes with snaps at the crotch. Mothers love them because it keeps the T-shirt from riding up and exposing that cute little baby belly.
Baby kimono: this one isn’t as crazy as it sounds, and it’s actually a very practical clothing item. A baby kimono is really just a robe that wraps around the front and is secured with a matching cloth belt or tie. They’re great for quick diaper changes, since they don’t even have any snaps like onesies do. And if you’re curious about why they aren’t just called ‘baby robes’ instead of baby kimonos, then let me refer you to the Zen puzzle regarding ‘the sound of one hand clapping.’ In other words, there is no rational answer to your question.
So there you go, Dad. These are just a few important terms that you should know in case you get roped into helping Mom shop for the ‘layette.’ You’ll be able to impress her, and any sales clerk that’s helping you, when they realize that you speak their secret language.